It's been 26 days and it doesn't get any easier

There is no shame in crying for your loss. I miss you and I can't stop. These have been the longest 26 days of my life. For the first time in my life I have to put on a happy face while my heart and soul are destroyed. How do I not put on a smile for our litte boy.

Why did you walk out? You might have loved me, but was it real love? Real love does not fade and it does not so easily give up on the person you've shared so much with.

I love how you are doing it, you are having the time of your life, playing boyfriend and stepdaddy to a little girl whose own daddy did not stick around for. I asked and will ask forever....why would a man wanna play stepdaddy when he can plain and simple just be a DAD...!!!!

I don't deserve any of this, but then again I didn't deserve the way you treated me when we were together either. You ask why did I stick around?....like I just said, when you love someone you just don't give up.

You knew you were being awful to me, you knew and you know I did not deserve that, not now, not ever, and now I get an apology, is that supposed to heal my pain? or was it just something you did to feel less guilty about stomping on my heart.

You don't deserve me, you never did and the way you are acting I don't think you ever will. You lied to me, viciously and pathologically lied for 4 fucking years. Let me LOL about you telling me you loved me under the full moon, let me LOL about that fucking kiss under the stars, let me LOL about all the candlelit dinners and breakfast in bed and passionate showers together, you know why? because it was an act, it's your fucking M.O., you did it to me and you will do it to all your random bitches. That is all I was a random bitch, who you felt compelled for because of all the humiliation you had seen me going through.

You are evil and karma will catch up with your ass...then you ask why shit never goes right for you. You and karma have so much to resolve you'd be lucky if you get to be happy by the time you turn 50. Lo que en esta tierra se hace, en esta misma tierra se paga. You talk about FG but you are just like him, come on 4 phone calls, 2 emails and multiple BBM's and you looked at the phone and ignored each and everyone....remember that is exactly what he used to do, which makes you no better than him.

Yeah, all my exes have been fucking losers, so I shouldn't complain right? Bullshit, no of them were the ONE, none of them were my best friend, none of them were my last try at love, none of them gave me the moon...............


LOL!!!!! VERY LOUD!!!!! And the sickest part is that I still love you.......What a waste....!!!!!!!!